“One of the greatest mental freedoms is truly not caring what anyone else thinks of you” ~Β Anonymous (tweet this)
These days, I try to live my life by one simple rule – never be ashamed of what has made you the person you are.
I’ve got to be honest – it’s a toughie, and I struggle with it. I struggle to be proud of anything I have achieved, and shame and regret come easily to me. I often find myself wishing that I could go back in time and change many things about my life.
And yet, here I am – in a pretty good place. My professional life is chugging along nicely, and I love this blog and every single awesome reader who takes the time out of their day to read my ramblings. My personal life is good, and I have for the time being achieved a good balance and diversity in work and play.
Who’s to say where I would be in life if I could go back and change my course? It is easy to regret, but perhaps the darkest moments in your life have ultimately contributed to your strength and character.
There is a better way to look at regret – it changes nothing. Looking back at what you would have done differently achieves nothing – it is what you do in the present that makes all the difference in the world.
Embrace Yourself
So please – don’t be afraid to acknowledge and embrace every part of your history and character. Strive to make yourself a better person, but never be ashamed of who you are.
If you have non-mainstream views on life, don’t be afraid to voice them. Sure – don’t shove your beliefs down people’s throats (no one should do that), but don’t hide them either.
And as for the people who judge? They’re not worth your time.
The Key to Being More
Everything that we experience as human beings is relative to our own perception. One person’s challenge is another person’s cakewalk. One person’s accomplishment is another person’s baseline. And one person’s hardship is another person’s bliss.
There are no prizes for having experienced terrible things in life. The most you can hope to receive is sympathy for your plight. It is ultimately up to you to make the most of the cards you are dealt in life.
If your internal monologue is an endless “why me” on repeat, you are doing nothing more than feeding your own sense of self-pity. And since each and every one of us only has 24 hours per day on our very limited time on earth, you owe it to yourself to do something more productive with your time.
Here’s what it comes down to – your achievements in life are largely dependent upon attitude and application, not circumstance. Ultimately, your success is defined by how you react to the greatest adversities that you face, not how those adversities govern you.Β The sooner you realize that, the sooner you will understand that you are far more in control of your destiny than you ever thought possible.
So…About Me.
Since I have gained a few new readers since this blog re-launched last week, and with the above message in mind, Β I thought that this would be a good time to tell you a lot more about myself.
Some of the things that I am about to tell you are the kind of things that I wouldn’t actually tell some of my closest friends. Some of them may well read this post, in which case they’ll now. But hell, life’s too short, right?
Here we go.
38 Things I’ve Never Told You
I’m 26 years old, 6’1″, and about 200lbs. My birthday is September 5th.
I was a fat kid, then I shot up about 6″ when I was 16.
I suffered from depression in my childhood – my teenage years were miserable.
With exception to 3 years at university in Nottingham (plus holidays and traveling), I have spent my entire life in Rugby.
I love inappropriate and immature humor in many different forms.
I’m the lead singer/guitarist in a band.
Last year I grew a horseshoe mustache.
I love movies. I probably go to the cinema once per week on average.
I have a heart condition that means I cannot drink alcohol or caffeine. When I tell people I don’t drink, they often assume I am a recovering alcoholic.
I love the USA, and have been there more times than I can count. I may well live there one day.
I have an older brother. I used to work with him in the family business.
I went on the world’s biggest skycoaster, twice (both times with my sister) – a decade apart.
I don’t really talk to anyone about personal things.
I have an older sister who lives in Houston, Texas. She has three kids. I miss them all a lot.
I have been single most of my life.
I often feel extremely awkward in emotional situations.
I played an ugly sister in a school play. After the first performance, I got told off for playing with my fake breasts too much.
I am extremely competitive.
I can be arrogant.
I am a perfectionist.
I once performed Ricky Martin’s “Livin’ la Vida Loca” in front of a sizable crowd on a cruise ship talent show:
I have an hereditary skin condition called vitiligo.
I love sports – cricket, golf, squash, American Football, football (soccer), and more.
I love music festivals. Not nearly as much fun when you’re sober though.
I only buy new clothes when absolutely necessary.
I am terrible at keeping in touch with my friends.
I am very independent.
I am very private, and not prone to revealing much about myself (this being the exception that proves the rule).
I love dancing like an idiot at weddings and in nightclubs, and have won my share of impromptu dance-offs.
Every time I watch a movie with a buff lead male role, I decide to start working out. It never happens.
I have a potty mouth.
I have always instinctively assumed that I will achieve remarkable things. Whether I will or not remains to be seen.
Last year, I followed the Primal Blueprint for 2 months.
For all of 6 months or so, I was an avid runner. I dropped 28lbs and ran a half marathon in 1h48m (and 13 seconds).
I suffer from insomnia and restless leg syndrome.
I am an atheist, but try to be open minded to anything that is not scientifically disprovable.
A couple of years ago, I told my best friend (female) that I was in love with her. We haven’t spoken since.
Thank You
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for taking the time to read this. I hope it resonated with you and perhaps even made you think about how you might work towards a better life for yourself.
I think that writing out a list like the above is a progressive and rewarding thing to do. You should try it – even if no one reads it. I’d love to read your thoughts in the comments section too.
Michelle Dale says
Ahhh small world, my Dad lives in Rugby, I visited a couple of times they have a nice Tesco on the big roundabout lol.
Tom, you’re a darling, you’ll be beating the ladies off with a stick now they know your available π
Tom Ewer says
We do indeed…it is predictably depressing that the primary thing you remember about Rugby is Tesco π
Michelle Dale says
No, I remember the retail park opposite Tesco as well lol π
Derek says
Wow, very personal. I’m happy to find there are quite a few things we think alike about.
Your Ricky Martin performance was pretty awesome. That would take a lot of courage to do… but you’re probably comfortable with that type of situation from being in a band.
Tom Ewer says
Not easy to do when you can’t be aided by a bit of dutch courage π
We hadn’t actually gigged at that time – that was the first time I’d performed in front of people since school.
Jeffrey Morgan (@jeffreymor) says
What kind of Dutch courage is that if you can’t drink alcohol?
Tom Ewer says
It’s not dutch courage…that’s why I said I can’t be aided by dutch courage!
Matt Peacock says
Tom, that had me laughing out loud, brilliant and honest article that i can certainly relate too, thanks for sharing!!
Tom Ewer says
My pleasure Matt π
Steve Rice says
Enjoyed getting to know a bit more of you personally in this post, Tom. I may do the same in a post on my site. Might have to write it after I have a good stiff drink, though.
But that brings me to the two main reasons I think that I have connected with you and your blog so well–your unfailing honesty and keen sincerity.
Love this new direction on your site. Keep up the good work, my man!
Tom Ewer says
Thanks for the feedback Steve, it means a lot to me π
Samantha says
Tom, excellent post. You made me giggle, lots. I was recently given The Seasons of Life by Jim Rohn to read, and in there is a passage basically saying we are the sum of the paths we have taken. That passage really affected me (I had thought I’d made some awful decisions – inc quitting 2 unis and 3 degrees!) but I now think differently. To have an excellent blog like yours agree the point, makes me once again look at my life differently and will hopefully spur me to start my blog! Thanks for sharing! Oh and Michelle’s right, you’ll be beating them off now!
Tom Ewer says
Hey Samantha,
Nice to hear I made you giggle π and I’m looking forward to seeing your blog whenever you launch it!
Cheers,
Tom
Jason Morgan says
Tom –
Great post. You’ve inspired me to write one of my own for my audience. You write much older than your age, that’s a good thing. The quote at the top is dead on.
/religious note/ I’m a bit surprised you’re an atheist, but it doesn’t really matter to me either way. Once I had kids my religious beliefs changed dramatically. Being open is the key. Science can be arrogant and is always right…. until it’s wrong, which with time, it always is. /end religious note/
Great stuff, I look forward to the next post.
Jason
Tom Ewer says
Hi Jason,
I’m glad I’ve inspired you! I think posts such as this are great for connecting more with your readers. I can’t take the credit though – I got the idea from Corbett Barr – the guy is a legend.
I try to be open minded at all times π
Cheers,
Tom
Thomas @ Mobile App Tycoon says
Very interesting bits about yourself – I know I can relate with a lot of them! Looking forward to reading more from you!
Thomas
Tom Ewer says
Thanks Thomas π
Adrian says
Tom,
I’m disappointed. You admitted to this:
“Last year I grew a horseshoe mustache”
and you didn’t include a photo of it? π lol…
An enjoyable and openly honest post…
Thanks for sharing.
Adrian
p.s. There are worse landmarks to associate with Rugby….like for example the Cemex plant that dominates the skyline. I pass it regulary en-route to visit family.
Tom Ewer says
I know, I know! I don’t have a photo – I think at the time I didn’t want photographic evidence π
I live about 500 yards from the Cemex plant. So, yeah…
Sheyi @ Ivblogger.com says
As much as i love the sincerity in this post and all what you posted, been someone who has sold his life to Christ, I’d love you to re-think about been an atheist. It doesn’t make sense to me though.
Yeah, this aint a religious blog so nice write up and i wish i could be open like this on my blog.
I was wondering if you were 38 – you know how those guys write it? 21 lessons in 21 years living blah blah blah
Sheyi
Tom Ewer says
Hi Sheyi,
Why can’t you be as open on your own blog? What is holding you back?
Cheers,
Tom
Sheyi @ Ivblogger.com says
When i say open, i mean to get down and write about my personal life just like you did. I’m always open when i write blog posts and i do that with every pint in me. I do enough research and gives out the best. June 12 is my birthday maybe i could do something like this…
Sheyi
Tom Ewer says
I think you should π
Sarah says
You know I’ve been really busy lately and when I got your message in my in-box I wasn’t going to click to read because I simply need to sleep (2 young kids & a newly launched business – say no more!)… But now I’m really glad I did. I really enjoyed reading such a laugh-out-loud collection of insanely British treasures. What a treat! I feel I know you better now and as we come from the same side of the pond I hope one day our paths may cross. Big smiles to you Tom x
Tom Ewer says
Hey Sarah,
Your comment popped up just as I was reading through them!
I’m glad you liked it – you have no idea how big a smile it brings to my face when I get feedback like yours π
Your website looks fantastic by the way!
Cheers,
Tom
Joe Boyle says
Reminds me a bit of myself, really (; I think one of the greatest things a blogger can do with his/her community is be open. The relationship between blogger and reader is one that requires constant attention (it’s a lot like real life, I suppose π ). Being able to not care what others think of yourself is a key trait that most of society lacks in today’s world. If you were to time-travel back to 1960 or 1970 where the life-motto was a lot different, you’d see more people willing to be themselves. But the pressures of society have squished us in.
I commend you for being able to be open with us readers. Great post.
Tom Ewer says
Thanks Joe. It wasn’t easy to click Publish, but as I said in the post, life is too short!
As for not caring able what people think…it’s an incredibly rare trait. To be fair, I think it is useful to an extent, but as you imply in your comment, how we think other people perceive our behavior has become far too important in the modern age.
I think that most of us should work to try to care just that little bit less.
Abdul says
I believe the first step to self-actualization is letting go of one’s fears of acceptability into the society and be happy for what they are. This is an excellent post, I’ll be subscribing to your blog now. π
Tom Ewer says
Couldn’t agree with you more. Thanks Abdul – glad you like it! π
Darlene says
Gutsy post! Big kuddos for putting it out there.
I like to think that age has something to do with not caring what people think, but the real factor is simply accepting yourself. Not defining who you are thru other people’s eyes.
That can be accomplished at any age!
Tom Ewer says
I think it can be age (certainly our teenage years are perhaps our most self-conscious). But as you say, accepting yourself is the key, and that can be done at any age.
Celia says
Serendipity – I opened your email moments after I had just found myself saying the same thing [about not bothering to accept anyone’s opinion of oneself]… that it’s irrelevant to the truth of the complex wonderful person you are. Excellent post – I’ve written similar lists of who I am, in the past – time to do it again.
Definitely you are on track – Celebrate it all. Thanks for a great post.
Tom Ewer says
And thank you for the comment Celia! π
Vidya Sury says
I usually lurk, read and move on. This post touched me in many ways. Thank you so much for sharing yourself, Tom. I am definitely inspired to do one of me along these lines, except, I don’t think I’d publish it. My about me page on my blog is a list of sorts.
What can I say? You rock! And that quote at the beginning of your post? Shall go into my all-time favorites!
Thanks again!
Tom Ewer says
Awesome Vidya – I’m so glad that (a) you enjoyed it, and (b) it compelled you to comment!
Justin says
Damn, Tom…brilliant post.
Quite often, posts like this are filled with “false modesty” or admitting small flaws or differences that don’t really make much of a difference or aren’t really that personal. Kudos to you for actually hanging it out there…
When I started reading the post, I was worried that it was going to be “me, me, me” and not really connect with your readers much. I was wrong…felt real connection to this one.
I’m really interested to see where you take this over the next 3, 6, or 12 months. I’m a big fan and will be watching closely!
Tom Ewer says
Hey Justin,
As always, your kind words mean a great deal. And I’m glad I didn’t disappoint with the content of the post – it certainly wasn’t my intention to hold anything back.
Thank you!
Tom
Zimbrul says
Man, I’m one of your constant readers and I don’t live far from your place. I’ve noticed the new look of your site (the header I mean) and I think I share some of your characteristics and this is the one about buying clothes.
One suggestion about the homepage (not about you :P) : I’d make the opt-in box’s background red
Tom Ewer says
Hey,
Glad to hear you’re a regular – I remember chatting with you on Twitter not too long ago π
Why red? I know it’s a standout color, but it’s quite a step away from the design…
Cheers,
Tom
Lisa says
True transparency for the hell of it….I love it!
We can all relate to some of those pieces and thank you for sharing your human touch!
cheers.
Tom Ewer says
You’re welcome Lisa – thank you for commenting! π
Nando says
Now is when I remember why I subscribed to your site… π
You really nailed connecting with the people.
I think is a bit shocking this self-exposing gesture. But shocking for me is double-sided sword and I wonder where this path goes.
-Kirk:”We did make a difference?”
I think you do!
Tom Ewer says
Glad I could remind you Nando! π Thanks for commenting π
Tito Pandu Brahmanto says
Very interesting and inspiring post. You’re really getting naked for us your readers.
It’s nice to read this post, i’m inspired.
Tom Ewer says
Glad to hear it Tito! π
Tory says
“I am an atheist, but try to be open minded to anything that is not scientifically disprovable.”
Nice! I knew there was reason I liked you right away!
Good post man! Like the new blog layout, as well.
Tom Ewer says
Thanks Tory, on both counts π
Joe says
Hey Tom – Was surfing around and some link led to your blog. I haven’t been by in a while, but I’m glad I came by to catch this post.
I think you can add a #39 to the list: Pretty effin brave.
And possibly a #40: Maybe effin crazy.
π
Nice post.
p.s. Glad to see you like “men’s” football — or “American” football as you lot call it. Who’s your team?
Tom Ewer says
Hey Joe!
Brave…I don’t know. Crazy? Probably π
I don’t have just one team in particular that I support in the NFL, but I like the Ravens and the Texans. Different story when it comes to college though – hook ’em horns! π
Chris Deals says
Enjoyed the post, feels like I know you now π
We have a lot in comment. Here’s a few; I enjoy cricket (West Indian Fan) and proud to admit it π and I have told my best friend (female) that I was in love with her. We havenβt spoken since. LOL
Tom Ewer says
Well at least we share one good thing in common! π
Your guys did great today – especially Tino! π
Brandon Yeager says
Tom,
Thanks for the insights. your marathon run time…golly…that’s awesome! seriously. I played a little rugby in college, was lots of fun. And, sorry to hear how things worked out with your best friend.
Take care,
Brandon
Tom Ewer says
Thanks Brandon, appreciate it π
Jeffrey Trull says
Thanks for sharing, Tom! I, too, love dancing like a fool at weddings (just did last night, actually!) Hope to see you stateside sometime!
Tom Ewer says
Glad to hear it π If I’m ever in Connecticut I will be letting you know!
Chris says
Hi Tom, thanks for sharing it with us. You are young, really brave person! And your performance was great π
BR, Chris
Tom Ewer says
Thanks Chris, appreciate it π
Cristina Ansbjerg says
Hi Tom,
nice to know more about you. I totally share with you the aversion to tell people about your personal life. But sometimes it’s necessary.
I hope your heart condition is not severe. My sister has one too, she was born with it. But her life so far has been totally normal, except she has to be careful when doing some efforts.
Cristina
Tom Ewer says
Hey Cristina,
It’s great to hear from you – I hope that things are good with you!
At the moment it’s not severe (I’ve had a close call in the past). I may be having surgery to fix it soon, because it might become a bigger problem in the future. We shall see!
Cheers,
Tom
Kelli says
Tom, I put off reading this when it first arrived…I was busy and somehow I just KNEW that it would be so special, I wanted to read it when I could give it my full attention.
That was this morning…and with all the love and admiration I have in me, I have to say that it touched me deeply.
I put everything I have into the subjects I teach, but you’ve helped me to understand that what is missing is the “me.”
Thank you Tom for touching this subscriber in a way I’ll never be able to fully explain. Know that it has, and will continue to influence my writing from now on.
Kelli Roig
Tom Ewer says
Thank you Kelli for taking the time to tell me what an impact this post has had on you. It honestly means the world to me.
Diane Hynes says
I read this quote somewhere recently.
“I’d rather be hated for who I am, than to be loved for who I’m not.”
I just recently joined your post and am looking forward to reading more!
Thank you, Diane Hynes
Tom Ewer says
Hey Diane,
I’ve heard that quote before – it’s good one, and certainly appropriate!
Cheers,
Tom
Michelle says
Long-time reader, but first time commenter here. Just had to share that I’ve been on that exact same skycoaster – though I was only brave (crazy?) enough to do it once! I grew up living about three hours from Orlando, so the Epcot picture was familiar too. π
I also have a suggestion as regards your RLS & insomnia, if you’re interested (based on my own experience with both issues). Don’t want to go giving unsolicited advice, though, if it’s also unwanted. π
Take care,
Michelle
Tom Ewer says
Hey Michelle,
I love long-time reader, first time commenters! π
The Skycoaster’s a lot of fun, if a little terrifying, isn’t it? It was strange going back to Orlando after having not been there for over 10 years, but I had a great time.
I’m all ears regarding RLS and insomnia – drop me a line!
Cheers,
Tom
David Shaw says
Hey Tom, great site, great post, great story! Keep doing what your doing. Inspiring stuff.
Take it easy
David
Financial Samurai says
Nice to meet you Tom!
Ever follow Cal Berkeley rugby? They are the dominant College team for the past decade. Must be kinda different.
Good to discover your blog from Money Spruce.
I’m about to embark on a self employment journey with a book coming out on how to profitably quit your job in July.
Hope to connect and stay in touch!
Sam
Tom Ewer says
Hey Sam,
I prefer American Football to Rugby to be honest! Which is rather ironic, given that I actually live in Rugby (where the sport was invented!).
Cheers,
Tom
Nooruddin says
Whoa! We share the same birth date, pretty similar age, interests and some hobbies too! No kidding.
Currently in the rat race, trying to find my mark with increasing online business footprint – I agree with your philosophy of making a difference by doing something of your own with something you own!
Cheers and best of luck!
Nooruddin
Tom Ewer says
Same to you Nooruddin! π
Bart says
Hey Tom,
Kinda funny how I got on your blog in the first place – was Googling “WP tables”, then saw your post on WPMU.org on WP-tabels reloaded and before I know, I was reading your 38 things π post.
I esp. love the βOne of the greatest mental freedoms is truly not caring what anyone else thinks of youβ quote! And probably like some other men here, you made me laugh about when seeing a strong male actor in a movie and then wanting to work out. “It never happens”. LoL π
I can barely recall EVER leaving a comment on somebody’s webblog, but I felt like I just had to give you some sort of reply / credit for what looks like a nice and interesting blog (I put you in my favorites bar)
Greetings,
Bart from The Netherlands.
PS I share a lot of your vision on “not wanting to work for someone else”. Alongside my own business (small webshop in organic coconut oil and some digital products), I had been working in the last year for a big company, making nice money (I have a family you know , 2 yr old girl and 7 yr old son). But since two weeks now I am unemployed.
But can you imagine how I am practically and enthusiastically focussed on my own business now 24/7? I have found the energy to refresh a couple of my websites, I have launched a new website, and am now working on a new project.
I don’t need to be “filthy rich” but I would be a very very happy man if I could provide for my family on basis of my own business.
Sorry for the XL post, I presume you are a very busy man, bye bye now and take care π
Bart – The Netherlands
Tom Ewer says
Hey Bart,
It’s an absolute pleasure to hear from you! Or read you, at least π
That particular post drives quite a lot of traffic to this site (relatively speaking)…it was a SEO experiment gone right! The plugin is awesome by the way π
I feel really privileged that you’ve chosen to comment, considering you don’t usually…that makes me feel like I’m doing something right, and I really appreciate the gesture.
I’m really sorry to hear about you being unemployed, but it sounds like you’re turning it into an opportunity to create something far greater than what you had before. So I’m excited for you!
Let me know if I can be of any help π
Cheers,
Tom
Bart says
Hi Tom!
How nice of you to respond so soon and I believe you couldn’t be farther from the truth in saying that I am indeed turning this situation now into an opportunity to create something far greater. And I’m not “just saying this”…I’m DEAD serious about it! π
Meaning, where I live (The Netherlands), it is now as I’m witing, 23:03 PM and I have been working non-stop on my new project for several hours now without a break π Hehehe and it feels soooooo d##m good (I’ll try to keep it nice and clean as you can see :P)
I would go in further detail since I am so incredibly enthusiastic about my own project but I would want to bore you (just my conclusion I know – maybe later !)
Anyways, I am sincerely pleased to be having this chat with you…you are on that side of the world and I am here and still I have the feeling there is some kind of connection π
BTW 5 things I never told YOU π
1) I like playing texas hold’em 2) Daniel Negreanu is my big example, 3) I like metal and hard rock music (KoRN, Lamb of God, Amon Amarth, Metallica (Yeah!!), GnR old style, Limp Bizkit, Linkin’ Park, 4) I am somewhat narcissistic :P, and 5) man I’m in the ZONE and in the FLOW so I’m off to workign again…for mySELF that is!! π
Warm greetings,
Bart
Brian Sommers says
let me guess.
you have Wolfe Parkison White Heart disease? I used to have that.. get the radio frequency ablation procedure done!
Tom Ewer says
No Brian – I suffer from atrial fibrillation. I’ve never actually heard of Wolfe Parkison White Heart disease. I’ve decided not to have the procedure and stick with the medication for now – it’s pretty manageable at the moment.
Brian Sommers says
I guess the procedure would be fairly similar? I assume you are on some form of a beta-blocker? I used to take Inderal/Propanalol except mine got so bad, my heart would go into a SVT every time I would like down to try to sleep..
I’m glad it’s not to bad.
Niall says
Hey Tom,
I read the post but admittedly not all the comments. I would emplore you to call your best friend again.
Tell her that you know things ended badly/awkwardly and that you miss her and that you don’t expect to reconnect but simply let her know that she was a large and positive part of your life.
Say thanks for the good times and wish her all the best. Then simply say goodbye.
Try it and see what happens, let me know.
Niall
Tom Ewer says
The words “can of worms” and “opening” come to mind Niall π
Niall says
sometimes worms are good!
Tom Ewer says
I don’t fishing, so for me, they are not π
I like what we’re doing with metaphors here π
Terry says
I suffer with Restless Leg Syndrome as well.
Its incredibly annoying. I probably should try and keep a regular sleep pattern.
I’ve decided after reading your blog (and 100’s more like it), that I also want to be location independant.
I work in the web industry as well.
Tom Ewer says
Location independence rocks Terry, come join the party π
Bradley says
Great post. Much different than I’m used to reading at the WPManage blog.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone use the term ‘location independent’ before. π There are a number of other like terms I’ve heard, though, such as ‘P.T.’ (coined by Dr. W.G. Hill) and ‘Working Nomad,’ among others. I’ve thought very seriously about actually starting a blog/website doing just that. Anyone else be interested? Tom?
Tom Ewer says
Hi Bradley,
Welcome from the ManageWP blog! π
Location independence is quite the catchphrase in the internet marketing niche π I’m not sure what you’re saying that your blog would be about, nor what you’re asking if we’re interested in…
Cheers,
Tom
Melanie Chisnall says
This is a fantastic list of who you are, Tom! Believe it or not, I also performed to that Ricky Martin song, although it was for a modern dancing concert about 10 years ago! I have also recently taken the plunge to work full-time as a freelance writer. I decided this in March earlier this year and left my full paying job at the end of August. It’s been interesting, tough, depressing, exciting and scary. Reading your blog and motivational stories have convinced me even more to the fact that I made the right decision. Thanks! π
Tom Ewer says
Hey Melanie,
Thanks π Congratulations on striking out on your own! I fully understand the full range of emotions you have experienced π Glad my blog can be of some help.
Cheers,
Tom
Daniel Vazquez says
Hey!
I discovered you followed me on Twitter and automaticaly your main objective resonated in me because that is what I always have wanted: leaving work behind. My story is similar in some ways, although I have just quit my job -not because I wanted, but I didn’t have the “You’re Fired” option -long story- less than a month ago and now I am left with two clients budgets for two projects and I am on the verge of redesigning my portfolio, site and CV to pursue my newly gained freelance life. Which is quite a challenge but I believe in me.
I also have to start making a blog since there is a lot of my story that can inspire others. But I am still thinking about options. I am from Spain (living in Barcelona, quite an international destination), so I thought about doing something in spanish, but as I have all my life been very anglophile, I think it is time to convert my main portfolio in English… it will take me to my next step, which is in the future living abroad (maybe UK or Sweden, I already made my wishes).
Sharing this with you is something that comes from inside as all you shared here makes me confortable and lets me know that there’s more people like me, which are fighting for their own destinies. And that anything will let us down. It’s all about believing in our own potential and being honest with what we do.
I would tell you more about my “change” here (it envolves losing 20 kg in the last year -via sport (mainly running and spinning) and healthier food- and becoming a better person in terms of self-esteem and all those personality issues we can all have from time to time) but I think that will maybe appear in my upcoming blog, which I think I can do, as I think that one’s personal story has the power of inspiring others, just like yours is doing right now. Or maybe if we get a chance to meet whenever I fly to UK in a future, a beer would be nice.
I have lots of posts still to read in your blog yet (I already read some of them, which were quite interesting, it only gets better), but I have to tell you that I will do it with pleasure.
Hope you didn’t get bored of this and know you have one more fan over here, best regards from Barcelona!
Cheers, mate!
Daniel
Lois M says
You have a achieved a remarkable blog, be proud of yourself! Think well of yourself. Thanks for sharing!
Tom Ewer says
Thanks Lois, very kind of you to say so π
Sandra says
That’s pretty brave of you, Tom. (And the singing ain’t half bad either :).
Thanks for sharing your insight!
Tom Ewer says
My pleasure Sandra π
Karen Renee says
Your thoughts are very helpful as I launch my new site. I’m enjoying each new post as I dive in, but this is my favorite so far.
I’ve already saved the URL to a shared RSS feed of recommendations to my readers, as an example of the Glass Heart skill of accepting and reflecting upon life-as-it-is that I hope to encourage as a necessary element of personal growth.
Thank you for sharing. — I’ll go back to reading now. π
Tom Ewer says
My pleasure Karen; read on! π
Laurie Eno / The Daily Corgi says
Straight up good stuff. I see a lot of myself in you. Is there something universal about those of us who just can’t conform and end up striking out on our own professionally? Must be. I’m not a snot nosed kid anymore but I sure do think I know what’s best more often than not. Luckily I’m wrong at least half the time, so I remain teachable.
Mostly.
Corgi On!
Tom Ewer says
I think for the most part it’s a certain type of person who feels compelled to strike out on there own, so seeing comparable characteristics probably isn’t that unusual. Thanks Laurie!
paiseleighgroove says
TOM!!! I stumbled upon your blog a last week and have not slept in days (well, not a full night’s sleep anyway) because I simply cannot stop reading (and researching) every word! This was by far the most personal page I’ve read and it just made me love you that much more.
I’m in my 40’s and work in a very dead-end-beneath-my-talents job. I’ve been told all my life by English teachers, Lit. Professors and friends that I should be writing for a living. However, I’ve never felt ‘good enough’ to do it despite all the praises from anyone that has read anything I’ve written.
Just recently I’ve started to research writing and ways to make money freelancing. I have to admit that I know absolutely nothing about blogging (actually I’ve learned quite a bit in the last week thanks to you) so I’m new to all of this. I’ve had to Google more things than most when reading all of your posts but I am so inspired.
One of the books I’ve been writing would absolutely benefit from a companion blog to go with it so that will be my first project. Then I’ve set a one year goal to be able to quit my job and write full time.
I thank you so much for your honesty, your willingness to share and your personal approach to helping others. I am sure I’ll be reaching out to you in the future and replying on more posts as I am now a life long fan of Tom :).
This post has inspired me to take a chance and finally do what I am passionate about, no matter what the outcome may be!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!
Craig says
Happy Birthday!!
Just received one of your mailing newsletters and got taken to this page.
I see its your birthday today so HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I hope you have a fantastic day and do some very questionable dancing later on!
Cheers
Tom Ewer says
Thank you Craig! You are officially the only Leaving Work Behind reader who remembered π
Petr Pacas says
Thank you for sharing this, Tom!
Tom Ewer says
My pleasure Petr π
Stephanie says
You know, I was reading through your old posts after having a week of ‘No more procrastinating, you hate your job, get off your backside and do something about it’, when I suddenly realised:
So many of those 38 things actually apply to me aswell.
As random a comment as this may be, actually found it inspiring. Thanks Tom π
Tom Ewer says
I’m glad I could inspire you Stephanie!